Self-Care Affirmations In Lieu of Watching the Netflix Documentary “Seaspiracy”
Why learn how to take care of marine life when you can take care of you?
Have you considered committing to the most ethical dietary plan, termed vegan when in 1944 Dorothy Morgan and Donald Watson removed dairy from the middle of vegetarian? If so, you’ll need words of encouragement to stay the course. You might also need to watch Kip Anderson’s documentary Cowspiracy as well as the film he produced called Seaspiracy, directed by Ali Tabrizi, which was recently released on Netflix.
But it’s not so bad to eat fish! you, a staunch pescetarian, might say while refusing to watch Seaspiracy. In that case, here are some self-care affirmations to encant in lieu of actually bearing witness to the corrupt and villainous fishing industry. Light some incense, put on your best wooden mala beads, polish that bathroom mirror for a deeply spiritual self-sesh, and let’s go…
Miracles and magic surround me everywhere I go!
(Okay, but even when they say they aren’t murdering dolphins, they are murdering dolphins. Those labels on tuna cans are a paid-for stunt rather than a confirmation of ethical practices; multiple dolphins are killed in order to catch a small amount of fish.)
I open to receive!
(Want to watch Midsommar but set in the Faroe Islands and instead of a couple of sacrifices, half of everyone dies? Want to see a village gang-murder pilot whales until the sea runs red? Like, for both food and funsies?)
Everything is working out for me!
(Psst, sharks are so scary, right? The seafood industry bumps them off right and left. But isn’t an ocean without sharks way scarier, since they are interconnected with us biologically to such a degree that without them, the human race is done?)
You do you, and I’m gonna do me!
(Fishing nets make up half of the plastic in our oceans, the film teaches us. Oh, but really focus instead on skipping the straw for the drink you got to go with your sushi. You are such a good environmentalist, just like Greta!!!)
I am the main character in my own life!
(Are you a slave to eating seafood, LOL insert Britney Spears song joke here? In Seaspiracy, we learn that there are actual slaves forced to work on fishing boats for sometimes ten years at a time. You’re anti-slavery, right?)
I release what no longer serves me!
(Want a new relationship to STDs? Farmed salmon get syphilis among other diseases and half of these wounded creatures are eaten alive by parasites and fed to the salmon you then eat. Sexxxy.)
As within, so without!
(Herrings fart to communicate. This is the only humorous anecdote in the entire film. Go eat some plants and let the herrings be flatulent in peace.)
You skipped Seaspiracy and now you can have positive vibes only!